Thursday, December 31, 2009

Killington 2009


This year traditional (10th!) ski trip to Killington - was the shortest (only two days), the coldest (-3F/-19C) and the "manliest" on record (no ladies). But despite all of that, we managed to make the best of it skiing non stop until the last lift.



More pictures are here.

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Russian Vodka Room

Alik and the family is here for the holidays. Which means lots of food and drinking and bonding of cousins from 3 to 16.

On Saturday, we went to the city and while Andra and Irene were getting some culture at the play "Wishful Drinking" - a one-woman show by a recovering alcoholic Carrie Fisher (Princess Leia), Alik and I were inspecting various flavored vodka at the nearby establishment with the promising name "Russian Vodka Room" (click on the picture on the left). My body was delivered home in the morning in my absence. How ironic.

The next day, while Daddy was still "under the weather", the surrealism continued with Irene and Max going to Brooklyn to see Kuklachev Cat Theater and with more bonding with more cousins from 2 to 22.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Кому рукава мешают...

Here is Max's performance of Brahm's Hungarian Dance No 5 at Steinway Hall in Westport.

Apparently, it was the long sleeves that interfered with Max's playing and made him stumble a couple of times. In his defense, I must say that he played nearly flawlessly during the rehearsals. But of course, the boy had to wear a fancy shirt, right?...

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

14,975




A surprise gift waits those who can figure out the meaning of this post title.
Another surprise gift (a 2-hour math lesson with Dad) awaits those who cannot.
You have to be younger than 18 to participate.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Bye Bye Birdie


Yesterday, we took a train to New York to see musical Bye Bye Birdie. Max went with us as a last minute, $110 addition. He was excited to see John Stamos, but it turned out that he confused him with the blond actor playing Full House Joey character (who I confused with Jeff Daniels). It was a very frustrating charade, on the way in, trying to figure out who confused who for whom. Actor playing Conrad Birdie (playing, horribly, I must add) was some teen-star Nolan Gerard Funk. Max said that he knew the guy and so happy he was in the play. All this excitement, however, didn't stop Max from falling asleep 10 minutes into the performance. He didn't wake up until the end, 2.5 hours later. Being unable to move or stretch, while Max was resting comfortably on my shoulder, I didn't find show much enjoyable. Also didn't help, being yelled at by an overzealous usher for attempting to drink a soda in the seat during the intermission. John Stamos sucked. The guy cannot sing, ok? The teen star sucked. Gina Gershon's Rosie was good. Bill Irwin's Mr MacAfee and what-her-name Mother character were slightly overcooked. The play was in the newly restored Henry Miller's theater on 43rd, where the mezzanine is at the street level and orchestra is in the below ground pit. After the play, the actors chatted up the audience into giving to some charity, quickly auctioning two sweat-stained John Stamos' t-shirts for $250 apiece. Well-aged female fans of Full House were screaming and yelling like Conrad Birdie groupies. Ah, theater...

Monday, November 9, 2009

Fixing the Wall

Max overheard us talking about the fall of Berlin Wall (today is 20th anniversary) and asked, very concerned - are they going to fix it?

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Art in New York City

Despite having to sit in traffic for hours, today's family outing in NYC was a good thing. First, we went to the Metropolitan Museum of Art, where we saw Robert Frank's The Americans (b&w pictures from his trips around the country in the 50s) []. Max didn't care much for it, making a point that unlike sculptures, the pictures we can study on the Internet. So, we saw some "real 3-D art" - Greek and Roman stuff and then an amazing exhibit of Japanese arms. 14 century samurai swords [], blades smooth and shiny like a brand new Toyota. Then, some Rodin, Europeans, impressionists, until, at a Van Gogh painting[], Max declared that art makes him hungry. We got out, had hot dogs [], walked a bit and sat down for a proper lunch []. We finished the day with a stroll through the Central Park - beautiful colors, soft low late afternoon November sun, faint smell of starting to rot leaves, red berries on graying trees [].



More pictures here

Monday, October 12, 2009

Max's Halloween Special

Max's getting ready for Halloween.

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Caterpillar

Here is what we found on the door outside. Anyone knows what this is? Leave a comment...


See more pictures here.

And thank you, Alik, for positive id on this thing - it is a "Spicebush Swallowtail Prepupa". See more here.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Mazel Tov, Таня и Илюша!!!

Совет Молодоженам от Ветеранов Семейной Жизни - Top Ten Reasons to Get Married

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Play: That Championship Season


Saw Jason Miller's play "That Championship Season" - sad and sorry middle-age men in a depressed 70s-era Pennsylvania town remembering evidently the only highlight of their lives - a victory in high-school basketball championship. Yay...

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Dad's F-word Birthday

In what emerges as a family tradition, the birthday boy was presented with this video short "Forty is an F-word" by Leon & Max.

Speed Limit 40

On the Labor Day weekend Monday, the friends&family threw Dad a wild party featuring young girls in skimpy skirts, vintage spirits, gourmet food, and, culmination of the festivities, a thriller movie "Speed Limit 40" by Alik.

Due to YouTube limitations, I had to cut the movie into three parts, so watch them in sequence. Total playing time around 15 mins.

Part I


Part II


Part III

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Dad Runs Marathon

In what appears to be an early sign of midlife crisis, Dad ran a marathon just days before his birthday.

Since Dad was the only participant of this unofficial marathon of his own design, Leon supposed to play the role of the cheering crowd, a mobile feed area and an EMT. Leon, however, overslept, and Dad had to reserve to drinking questionable quality water in the public restrooms along the way. Leon did eventually woke up, brought Dad some goodies and then organized a finish line celebration.

Here is the route:Dad finished the 26.75 miles in 4 hours 25 minutes. Since he overshot the official 26.22 marathon by more than a half-a-mile, he now claims that he finished the distance in 4:20.

Monday, August 31, 2009

Leon cleans his room

After we threaten Leon with an eviction notice, he got to work and eight hours and two extra large 50lb plastic garbage bags later, the re-arranged spotless room was ready for H&G cover. As a side benefit, he found about $40 in loose change and another $50 in lost gift certificates. We are now accepting bets on how long the new order will last.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Newport, RI

Last weekend, pumped by parent's stories of great white beaches, awesome seafood and quaint picturesque villages of Rhode Island, we decided that it's time to check it out ourselves. Maybe because it is just next door, somehow we never spent any time there (besides a couple of bike races). And because it was just a short ride away, we decided not to plan much in advance and just "wing it". The forecast was so-so - periods of rain and thunder - even more reasons, we thought, not to plan, expecting half deserted town with hoteliers and restaurateurs fighting each other for our business.

We got out of the house late on Saturday and immediately found ourselves sitting on I-95 packed with beach-headed losers in their minivans full of kids, dogs, bikes, boats and other recreational gear.

When we finally made it to Newport, the town was crawling with tourists and their cars. It was hot, humid and stuffy. Tired from a much longer than expected trip, we decided to cool off at some authentic seafood place. We were picturing a whole string of such establishments by the water. After another hour spent now in local traffic, we found no such place anywhere. The much hyped beach greeted us with signs warning of bacterial contamination. The smell of the air and the color of the foam corroborated the signs.

Oh well, we thought, let's find a hotel. There gotta be some food there, right? Deserted town it was not. The only decent place we could book for the night was a ridiculously overpriced "Captain Quarters" suite at Hyatt on the Goat Island.

The hotel looked great from afar. A red brick building on a little island connected to the main land by an elegant bridge. Our waterfront room promised great views off the private balcony. The waterfront view we had. Except that under our balcony, next to the water, we found not a beach, as one would expect, but a coral of garbage containers, A/C unit for the entire hotel and an exhaust from the kitchen. The hotel was hosting a wedding event and we could tell the progression of the celebration from the smell - meaty aromas of main course turning to whiffs of coffee and confections.

We finally got to the water in the hotel's pool. To get to the pool we had to parade in our swimming trunks in front of the well dressed wedding reception, but we didn't care. The fun was back and weekend started to look good again. Until the overjoyous and overexcited Max gaged on the pool salt water and threw up. He and Leon jumped out of the pool at once and watched, laughing, my spastic attempts to get "this shit out". Good thing it was getting dark and there was no one else there. We left the pool re-assuring each other than the filters would "most definitely" clean it up by the morning. We visited the pool next day. The filters must've be off that night...

We started Sunday with a proper room-service breakfast, which we then worked off on the Cliff Walk - a footpath by the old world mansions. Thick and unkept vegetation and hot and humid air reminded me of Volga cliffs in August (sans mansions, of course). We visited "The Breakers" - quite impressive in its opulence and so perfectly preserved.

Giving up on trying to find a beach in Newport, we crossed to the next island - Jamestown, known to Leon and me from the bike races. There, we found an okay beach, built a sand castle and played in the waves with Max, while Leon looped the island on his bike.

In the evening, we went to the lighthouse were we sat with other wave watchers mesmerized by huge waves crashing on the rocks. After some dinner (eh...) and famous local ice cream (double eh...), we headed home. The return trip was uneventful and quick.

It wasn't the most perfectly engineered weekend, but looking back, it was good to get away from the house. We were absent for a little over a day, but coming back felt like returning from a much longer vacation...

It's a Mac!

Sorry, PC.

Last week, Leon, tail between legs, fessed up that his old beat up Thinkpad is pretty much no more. Fed up with cantankerous Vista, we decided to switch sides and we got him a Macbook...

My Thinkpad tried to protest my placing the order by blue screening (how typical!), but we got it through and few days later, it arrived. Yeah, take this Lenovo, which took 6 weeks to deliver...

Monday, August 17, 2009

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Кулинар 2

Over this summer, Leon fully mastered the art of making a proper Grilled Cheese (hot pan, butter, bread, secret mix of three cheeses).

In an interview with our food critic, Leon said that he was inspired by Sponge Bob Square Pants.

Now, he is getting ready for the next culinary challenge - perfect French Toast.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Team "Starbucks"

For the past two weeks, in the evenings, Max and I teamed up biking / running to Westport downtown, joining there Irene, N.B. and occasionally Leon for a Starbuck.

Alas, all good things come the end and with N.B. going home last weekend, our team rides ended.

Also, after well-caffeinated Max couldn't get asleep one night, we imposed a 5PM curfew on "grown up" drinks for him.

Monday, August 3, 2009

Nine

Max's birthday this year fell on Sunday and we celebrated it with a large friends&family gathering. It was pouring rain up to the moment where people start arriving so we had to move the festivities indoor, but it worked out just fine. Max got tons of new Legos and stayed up late, well past midnight, churning out the assembled toys like a little factory. All it was left by the morning was a pile of empty carton boxes and clear plastic bags.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Cats and Dogs Days of Summer

Very weird summer this year - one day of sun - three days of rain. On another hand - the grass and leaves are thick and green and fresh, and air is wonderfully fragrant, like it is still May.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Great Parenting

By mistake instead of decaf got Max a regular strength Starbucks mocha. So, later that night, I ended up keeping Max (he couldn't sleep) company until three in the morning at what point I collapsed right on the floor in his room. Serves me right.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

XX

Celebrated the 20th anniversary with an impromptu gourmet BBQ gathering. Apparently, plenty of butter, rosemary and thyme makes any last-minute grill stuff gourmet...

In the living room, N.B. put out a gallery of our wedding pictures - huge b&w photos of some very serious looking underage kids getting married. On rare occasions when we show these pictures to Americans and they ask how could it be legal to get married that young, we say that it was ok because we were brother and sister.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Perfect Children


A parent dream - Max and Leon relaxing between a string quarter practice and golf lessons...

Monday, July 13, 2009

Happy Birthday, Mom!!!

The secret is out - Rachel told us that you're 34. Happy Birthday!!

*******************

Happy Birthday, Marina!!

We love you just the way you are!

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo


P.S. Good luck with the new office!


Sunday, July 12, 2009

Кулинар!

On Sunday evening we got together with parents and N.B. and celebrated the occasion with grilled 5-minute salmon (see below) and burgers.

5-minute salmon (credit and all complains for the recipe go to Krause)
  1. season Salmon filet to taste (don't you hate this portion - to taste! what if I don't have any?)
  2. wrap each filet in foil
  3. place wrapped pieces on a very hot grill, cover the grill (or don't, it's irrelevant)
  4. count until 600 (Mississippically)
  5. Done

It actually works!

Hurricane Slava

Perfectly engineered intersection of a number of bodies moving from different directions at subsonic speed had occurred precisely as planned at a certain door at a certain JFK terminal reuniting us with our dear friend Slava Krause who I haven't seen for more than 16 years (Irene saw him in '97). But it was like we parted yesterday. We spent three days and nights non stop catching up on the past and sight seeing the local surroundings and New York. The weather, thankfully, cooperated.

Here is a link to slideshow - all the good pics are from Slava's camera. He has a great photographer eye making even the office buildings look interesting. He was quite fascinated by all the skyscrapers, but he was quick to dismiss Central Park - you should come and see Peterhof, he said...

Energized and pumped by this meet and by our wonderful vacation in France, we are already thinking of new adventures together on either side of the Atlantic.

Waiting for Godot


On Friday, Irene and Leon went to see Beckett's "Waiting for Godot" on Broadway, with Nathan Lane, John Goodman and others. "The show(!) sucked", said Leon, who finished the book earlier in the year, "but performance was great"... Irene account was not much different.

Speaking of waiting, yesterday, Irene did a third in a week run to the airport where she picked up N.B.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Back Home

The trip back home was flawlessly uneventful. The usual after vacation blues didn't come this time as we were full of anticipation of our upcoming meeting with Slava Krause, scheduled to land at JFK on the way from a convention in Las Vegas at about the same time as us.

Dad picked us all up (thanks again!) and we were quick on the way home until, of course, we got stuck on the Belt.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Slideshow

Here is a link to the complete slideshow of our France vacation.

TDF Stage II

The second stage of the tour, from a couple of breakaway riders to the main pack, flew by us in a couple of minutes, but the whole spectacle started about an hour earlier. First came a sponsor caravan - plastered in ads, commercial-blasting vehicles with costumed characters throwing some promotional items into the crowd. After that came a long line of official and VIP vehicles. Then, after some pause, we heard thumping noise of TV helicopter and saw the blinking lights of the main motorcade. It sure looked more impressive than Obama's inaguration. Lots and lots of police cars and motorcycles with sirens on, swiping the entire road curb-to-curb, scaring off the spectators creating a safe bubble for the riders behind. The breakaway group zipped by next followed by a couple of team cars. Another few minute pause, another helicopter, even more police and then finally the main pack followed by scores of team cars, emergency vehicles, some stray left behind riders and finally more police. The moment the last official vehicle passed, the road workers on trucks dismantled and picked up the metal barriers and few minutes later the road was open to traffic and life went back to normal.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

On Transport and Transportation

Another day - another bike trek to Monaco. Piece of cake. Though I started getting a bit dizzy from all this little stupid cryptic road signs. Blue signs, green signs, white signs, yellow signs. Little car. Little truck. Black bicycle. Blue bicycle. Little person. Red person. Big little person and small little person. Big little person and small little person crossed. White circle double-crossed. Arrows pointing to the skyward. Arrows pointing downward. This fucking charade almost got us killed when thoroughly confused and disoriented by this iconography we ended up in a tunnel leading to a highway. After that we gave up the sign language and went by the sun and stars.

For the non-American readers - of all the rich pallet of international road signs, U.S. uses only two (stop and yield). The rest is written in pidgin English and well hidden by local vegetation.

First stage of TDF was the 15.5km time trial loop through hills of Monaco. It was quite packed, especially at the port and by the casino. Following the route, we crossed the entire country in search for the perfect spectator spot, got lost in all this carved into the mountain streets, got stopped and warned for erratic riding by local police, finally settling on a place squeezed between starting and finishing approaches.

Leon got busy running between both lanes, cheering each athlete by name in the athlete's native language ("allez, allez" for French nationals, "go, go" for the English-speaking and "давай-давай" for the Russians). I was stunned by his not only remembering the names of each of 180 riders but also by recognizing their low profile flying by at 45mph. To me, they all looked the same: woosh-helmet-ass-woosh.... I told Leon that I am really impressed by his mental prowess hinting that perhaps he could direct a fraction of this power to the studies. "Duh, Dad", said Leon, "the name is written on the support car following the guy..."

Irene and Max arrived by bus later in the day. We watched the end of the stage together and then had some dinner at the port. On the way home, we split up again - Leon and I rode and Irene and Max supposed to take the bus. Because of the street closures, by the time they got to the bus stop, it was too late and the service stopped. It was late and getting dark. Leon and I were away, happily pedalling home. Some nice lady helped them to find the train station. Irene had a 20E bill and an old-fashioned U.S. credit card (magnetic strip only) which the automatic ticket machines at the station refused to accept. Max had one American dollar. The train announcements were in French. Somehow, they managed to get on the right train, and, unable to buy tickets (the machine did not take the bills), rode it for free. Not to tempt the fate further, they took the cab from the station and the driver happily charged them the remaining 20E, thus restoring the justice and fairness in transportation.

Best Swim

Only when we thought that it could not possibly get any better, Irene said that we must go see Cap Ferrat - a semi-secluded place of rich and famous on a cape halfway between Nice and Monaco. But of course - rich and famous and us are like milk and honey, or, better put, honey and flies, where they go - we must follow. Irene and Max went on a bus and Leon and I followed on the bikes. The place was quaint and nearly empty, green, pastel colored villas and cobblestone streets spiraling down to the port. We went to the beach where we had lunch and then bought for a couple of hours a little place under the sun. I have to give it to Irene, swimming-wise, this was the best I've had so far. Sorry Aruba, Bermuda, California, Florida, Eilat, Long Island, Maryland, New Jersey, Volga and Norwalk YMCA, where it's either too hot or too cold, too windy or too stale, too choppy or too flat... At Cap Ferrat, they've got the all the controls right.

At night, among the DVDs left for us in the appartment, Max chose "Love Actually" and watched it with us dutifully closing his eyes through some inappropriate scenes. This was a gross miscalculation on my part - the game "let's Max choose what to watch" was a crude manipulation engineered to have Max select "Casino Royale" or "Raging Bull" (among other available titles). Oops.

Friday, July 3, 2009

The Apartment

Лихой толпой Ляховецкие кочуют по Ницце. Yesterday we moved to another apartment (we couldn't find a single rental to cover our entire stay). The new place is also on the Promenade, about half a mile closer to the center of town. The distance not large enough to justify a cab or even a bus, so we had to carry all our belonging ourselves. Our attempts to mount our luggage on the bikes the donkey style didn't exactly work but got us quite exhausted.

The night before the move, we did some laundry in the apartment washing machine - an ancient Bosch with some creaking knobs. The machine huffed and puffed and finally, well after midnight it came to stop. But it kept the door locked. An experimentation with all permutations of knob positions took about an hour and didn't deliver any results. Another hour killed searching for the manual on the Internet proved equally fruitless. I need to add here, that we traveled "light" this time, meaning that we took much less cloth than usual, thinking that we would just "do laundry". In other words, the evil washing machine had inside most of our wardrobe. Out of time and options, I started to contemplate a cross-town trek for emergency cloth shopping half naked, when the machine suddenly decided to unlock itself. Later, I found out that the machine has some built-in safety timer that unlocks the door a few minutes after it is turned off. Apparently, every time I moved the knob, the timer got reset, so the more I touched it the longer it kept our stuff. Wicked. The joyous reunification with our thoroughly washed belongings was quickly subdued by the thought that we now have to carry 15 pounds of wet cloth to the new place.

But the move was worth it. The new apartment was even bigger and more beautiful than previous. A wrap-around terrace big enough to host a party, huge rooms, high ceilings, numerous bathrooms, air conditioning and a new washing machine. Ah, la bella vita!
After our hostess left, excitingly, we explored the rooms, the aged but well made solid wood furniture, various paintings and vases, old fashioned bathroom appliances, cavernous closets and utility spaces. Then we remembered that we left Leon outside in the sun guarding the bikes (our hostess said that bikes in the flat are no-no, so we waited until she leaves to sneak them in). This time we had only six flights of stairs, though high ceilings more than compensated for the difference.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Lance!

In the afternoon, Leon and I rode to Monaco to see Tour de France opening (or team presentation) ceremony.

We made the 14 miles trip in about 45 minutes on a local road going up and down, around and through the mountains and seaside villages. At times the road was quite packed with traffic and the air was full of exhaust fumes. One of the French paradoxes - the bus schedule informs you how many carbohydrates your trip is going to burn, they recycle religiously and drive these little itsy-bitsy cars and noisy mopeds, but the pollution even on a seaside local road is more pronounced than during the peak hour on the Times Square. Still - everything around is so picture perfect and the drivers are gracious and patient and you ready to forgive them this little collective B.O.

Otherwise, the ride was not very demanding - the slopes are not as steep and turns not as treacherous than, say, California route 101 and despite the bikes being so heavy they needed to be pedaled going downhill, we managed to keep a decent pace (well, not according to Leon, but I'm happy with self).

In Monaco, the bike porn was everywhere. Leon, salivating, was going from one team bus to another, eating bikes with his eyes, taking pictures and filling me on all the technical details of the latest and greatest... Electronic gear shifting anyone? Coming to your stores soon...

We sat through the 2.5 hour opening ceremony - free seats, friendly ushers (they watched our bikes for us), and some crazy Australian girls seating next to us screaming loudly every time an Australian name was announced. I hoped they would start tearing their cloth off, but somehow it didn't happen. The Prince of Monaco read some speech, then each of the twenty teams was called to stage and each person individually presented. Breaks for commercial were filled by some bad and loud singer. But of course, everyone was waiting for Lance. His team (Kazakhstan Astana - why Kazakhstan? because they actually can) was presented second to last. Once Lance got off stage the party went down the hill and we rode back home.

(On the picture, to the left of Lance is new tour favorite Alberto Contador)

Bicycle Thief - cont'd

Beaming like an A+ student delivering a challenging assignment, we walked into the bike shop this morning carrying our police report papers. The clerk said "ok, senk you, and now I take your deposit". Then the following conversation ensued.
  • Me: you take?
  • Clerk: I take
  • Me: the deposite? (trying to pronounce it with French accent on the last syllable)
  • Clerk: the deposite
  • Me: all?
  • Clerk: all
  • Me: what about insurance?
  • Clerk: no insurance - you check (pointing to the rental agreement) - no insurance
  • Me: why did you send me to the police station?
  • Clerk: it's the leaw (law)
  • Me (thinking): fuck you
  • Clerk (thinking): fuck you
  • Clerk (suddenly smiling): oh! you go to kert!
  • Me: kert?
  • Another Clerk: court, justice
  • Me (thinking): fuck you
  • Another Clerk (thinking): you velcome
Evidently, one of the papers given to us at the police station was some sort of a claim that we could file with the local court (in person, of course). The form states how much damage I request from the perpetrator. The paper also has a separate line for compensation for troubles (pain and suffering, I guess). It was fun watching the two clerks discussing how much I should ask for that. After few minutes they came to agreement that I should ask for 20 (twenty) euros. Take this, tort reform!

Now, more than ever determined to get to stupid Monaco no matter what, I rented two more bikes. While filling the new contract form, savvy me (yes, you can teach an old dog one new trick), asked for the insurance. Clerk said, oh, no, it is not possible... We offer no insurance...

Oh well... But riding, no, gliding, on the bike along the coast, under the azure sky, in the bright but not too hot sun with fragrant and cool sea breeze all around is so heavenly that it makes all past troubles well worth it.

Until, of course, you come home and have to drag the heavy duty 20 kilo monster to the 7th floor, so that we can have a nice... phew... and... relaxing... breakfast.... Oh, and did I mention, it is two 20 kilo bikes now?

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Bicycle Thief

Max woke up in a great mood anticipating the promised toy. Half-heartly, he tried talk me into taking a cab instead of walking to the store across town. He said that he doesn't fill "amped" just yet that early in the morning. No deal, I said and Max quickly agreed to walking. After we got him his toy, we went to the beach. Ah, what did we know... While we were joyously bathing gaping at topless ladies on the beach, Leon's bike, double locked to the fence of our building got snatched. The thief left behind professionally cut lock cables so that we could have a proper closure and didn't think that somebody just mistaken our bike for theirs.

We went back to the shop thinking that our deposit (230E) is gone but they insisted that we go to the police station and file the report. 30 minutes it would take, they said. 30 minutes French ass. It took three hours before our number was called by which time I started to understand French laughing and rolling eyes in sync with other patiently waiting citizens of French republic. 20 more minutes of officer pecking on the keyboard and I was let go with a stack of papers with numerous seals and signatures. Will see what it does to my deposit.

As for the topless ladies - well, in the name of heterosexuality, most of them should never ever be allowed to be in public uncovered (is this sexist?).

On the way home we saw police building barricades around the road under our very windows. It says that on July 5th, it will be closed for traffic for Tour de France. So, may be after all, we don't have to bike to Monaco... The Tour is coming to us. I'm renting out our balcony for 230E. Any takers?

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

How to make Max smile

The morning started with a now traditional trip to a neighborhood boulangerie (булочная) for a baguette and then a breakfast, at home, of bread, eggs, cheese and ham. The bread and these eggs (huge, flavorful, deep yellow - one egg is truly a big breakfast) is something special and so far (my opinion) is the only basic food way better here than what we have back home. Cheeses and ham - not easy, but you can find. This bread and eggs - not really. Stew Leonard's and Fairway don't come close.

This time, I worked up some courage, and in addition to the baguette asked for the thing pictured here. Turns out it is a meringue (бизе) loaf with some cotton candy-like filling. Not really that good. Looks better on the picture then it tastes. Have no idea what it is called in French, but never mind anyway.

It was getting hot and we went to the plage (пляж). The beaches here are covered with pebbles but it was not crowded and the water was very very warm. Still, the beach bunnies Leon, Max and I are not. We left Irene there and headed to the city to finally get Leon a bike.

Naturally, when we got to the right bike shop, it was 12:05, which is when all French people go back home for lunch. The store was padlocked until 2. By now, hardened by long walks in Paris, the mere mile and a half under the blistering sun was nothing. After the lunch, determined to get the bike no matter what, I ran back to the shop. I was ready to pay the asking price and was happy that the asking price was quite low - 14E/day. In fact, renting the bike was the only relatively cheap thing during the trip, I think. Less than the price of a Chef Salad in your friendly bistro (tea is extra plus add like 20% in taxes). Of course it was not the bike Leon wanted - the road (racing) bikes were all rented out and all we could get is a heavy hybrid (did I mention we live on the 7th floor with such a tiny elevator it fits only a person and a baguette?). Dragging 50lb bike up the stairs brought back some well suppressed unhappy memories.

A swim in the sea restored our good moods and we happily made Max a triple-pinky-cross-my-heart-promise that tomorrow is going to be all about him and we are going to wake up bright and early and go to the end of the Earth to get him some Legos even if it involves buying raw plastic granules and manufacturing the toy ourselves on the hot pebbles.

See Max smiling in the picture? The simple and naive times where all you had to do to make child smile is to promise him some "птичка" are so over. A new dirty trick that so far works without a hitch on our open-minded boy is to use a certain keyword that trips his circuits and makes him smile uncontrollably even in the middle of the most hopeless tantrum. This certain keyword is "penis". Works especially good when whispered by the older brother in combination with any adjective or superlative. Try it at home. It is fun.

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